By W.R. Jones
This is as far as I got before my subject wandered off looking for more food. I was so jack-jawed by the loss of my model I had to console myself with another round of chocolate ooze cake with a dollop of vanilla icecream – ok, 12 dollops.
I’ve been seeing commercials on TV lately advertising Lasik eye surgery. The ad boasts of the great deal of getting two eyes done for the price of one, AND, there are no add-ons or upgrades. What the hell? What could be an add-on? “If you would like, sir, for a small additional fee, we could pluck some of that unibrow of yours and fill in a bit of that bald area.” “Lady, for only a little more we could swing this laser around and pierce your nose.” “Today’s upgrade includes the ability to see a single object instead of the usual two or three. This will greatly inhance your chances at three card monte.”
I really can’t handle any more ads. Judging by the number and insidious invasion of ads for obesity and limp dicks this country will soon be called FFA instead of USA. Fat Flacid America.
Please note the quality of paper I’m forced to draw on and send me some money.