By W R Jones
This is grandma – she always preached (I considered it proselytizing) telling the truth. So then, either she wasn’t my real grandmother or the theory of that DNA genetics stuff has a big hole in it.
I don’t consider moving sideways from the truth as an evil thing. I look at it as self defense. You are not going to believe this, but after getting paint all over my clothes last week and taking a tongue lashing that would do an Iraqi torture school proud, I went painting in a good shirt yesterday.
Yep, I am an idiot. I thought all I needed was to get a rhythm going; brush to palette, to canvas, back to palette, up to canvas, etc. I had a apparent ripple in my brain wave that went something like this: palette, canvas, palette, canvas, palette, shirt, canvas.
Oh Lordy, now I’m in serious trouble. Not to worry, I’m like MacGiver. I paid a fellow painter to take my shirt to her house, wash, dry and return it before the day was over. Whew!
Anyway, I have at least a casual acquaintance with the truth. Not so those miserable crooks that dominate the tv ads. I saw one yesterday promoting a weight loss pill. “Clinically proven weight loss’. I guess there is an area of an ad writer’s desk that is considered a clinic. Anything written with any part of the ad writer’s body touching or breaking the plane of the “clinic” area is clinically proven.
Isn’t the FDA supposed to monitor this crap? The small type at the bottom of the ad stated diet and exercise was also required. Holy cow! Is is really possible to be this stupid and still feed yourself? Well, I guess it is, and feed yourself very very well.
Not to worry, the product is guaranteed.