By W R Jones

Head Study 15

This is grandma – she always preached (I considered it proselytizing) telling the truth.   So then, either she wasn’t my real grandmother or the theory of that DNA genetics stuff has a big hole in it.

I don’t consider moving sideways from the truth as an evil thing.   I look at it as self defense.    You are not going to believe this, but after getting paint all over my clothes last week and taking a tongue lashing that would do an Iraqi torture school proud, I went painting in a good shirt yesterday.

Yep, I am an idiot.   I thought all I needed was to get a rhythm going; brush to palette, to canvas, back to palette, up to canvas, etc.   I had a apparent ripple in my brain wave that went something like this:  palette, canvas, palette, canvas, palette, shirt, canvas.

Oh Lordy, now I’m in serious trouble.    Not to worry, I’m like MacGiver.   I paid a fellow painter to take my shirt to her house, wash, dry and return it before the day was over.   Whew!

Anyway, I have at least a casual acquaintance with the truth.   Not so those miserable crooks that dominate the tv ads.   I saw one yesterday promoting a weight loss pill.   “Clinically proven weight loss’.   I guess there is an area of an ad writer’s desk that is considered a clinic.   Anything written with any part of the ad writer’s body touching or breaking the plane of the “clinic” area is clinically proven.

Isn’t the FDA supposed to monitor this crap?   The small type at the bottom of the ad stated diet and exercise was also required.   Holy cow!   Is is really possible to be this stupid and still feed yourself?  Well,  I guess it is, and feed yourself very very well.

Not to worry, the product is guaranteed.

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21 Responses to Truth

  1. Carol King says:

    Love the drawing of grandma. Is it on a paper bag?

    What is it with you, paint and paint on your shirts? May I suggest a smock?

    Anyone reading your blog on a regular (or even sporadic basis) knows you have a casual acquaintance with the truth. But your blog always makes me laugh.

  2. swatch says:

    I love this sketch – you are a master at this. I can hear the ‘truth’ lecture coming.
    I wonder if a disregard for common sense comes with art? I do this too when I (infrequently) get to do DIY. I have good clothes with glue and oil smears.

  3. I too like the drawing, Bill, and would enjoy reading something about it. As for your truth telling genes, maybe there is hope for you yet.

    Not to say I don’t enjoy reading about your foibles too!

  4. rahinaqh says:

    hi Bill, the grandma drawing is very touching, i see she has turned her back on you… or did you sneak up behind her? on a more serious note, you need brush soap: it is wonderful stuff and removes paint in an instant from clothes without leaving an awful smell. it’s excellent for brushes too and probably your teeth (clinically proven that 1% saw an improvement)

  5. InkSplodge! says:

    It’s obviously just a ‘male’ thing – I find handing over the stain removal product and letting him get on with it works better than any tongue lashing. Your fellow painter sounds like a pal and you can tell your grandmother was a character, even from this angle.

  6. G’day Bill! long time, no blog! with this drawing, I love how you say so much with so little. Holly

  7. What grace and fluidity in this post!
    And a lovely drawing, too.:-)

  8. You tell the truth — when it matters. No lies in your pencil sketch. Rather, it is full of life and spot-on truthful. So, I think, all in all, granny would be proud.

  9. wrjones says:

    Carol – a smock would make sense. So there is no living way I will be doing that.

    Swatch – thanks. I more or less disregard common sense in every aspect of life.

    Diana – I would write about the drawing if I could remember. I suppose this was another passing of time at some sleazy geriatric bar.

    Rahina – thanks for the cleaning tip. I tried it on my teeth. Here is a tip for you – don’t use turp on your teeth first, just use the soap, and don’t swallow the soap unless you are standing next to a bucket.

    June – you must have a lot of faith in your husband. When my wife last told me to remove the paint from my shirt I thought I was squirting it with pre wash, nope – I had the spray bleach. Did take the paint out. Took a great deal of the color out as well. Didn’t improve my standing with my wife at all.

    Holly – you you you Aussie babe. Did you go to that big rock yet?

    Kimiam – be honest was it a laugh or only a small chuckle?

    Cathyann – You are the only one to recognize how graceful I was applying that paint to my shirt.

    Aletha – If I were to use that phrase, “to tell the truth”, eyes would roll back so far they might lock up and blind everyone in my family.

  10. Nava says:

    “proselytizing” – now that’s a big word!! Your blog always has an educational value. I join the choir admiring this sketch. It’s got a wonderful looseness and yet I can see her expression.

    So, have you considered starting a business of painting on shirts? I mean, why fight against something you are so strongly drawn to?

  11. I have a pair of old jeans and flea bitten shirts to paint in at my studio. Sometimes I get lazy and don’t change. Brush to palette then the canvas, back to palette etc. Oh yes, clean brush on paint rag, lay rag on lap… oh my god!!!!!! Why do wives get sooo upset about paint on good clothes? I’m not a banker screwing customers with credit card tricks and bogus loan techniques. A little paint on my clothes advertises that I’m a poor, honest artist!

  12. wrjones says:

    Nava – Could you work up a business plan for the shirt painting business. Let’s see if we can attract some venture capital.

    David – I’m making my wife read your comment at gun point. This should get her to see the light. I’m a poor, uh, uh… honest? Oh, ya, honest, I’m honest dear. I’m poor and honest, and stupid.

  13. Rebecca says:

    Love Grandma. She seems busy with something very intense and laboring; must be looking at pictures of Hugh Jackman. (it’s ok if you don’t understand)

    I love your good ‘ol honest approach.

    by the way, there are pinups on my blog now..just for you dear.

  14. wrjones says:

    Rebecca – that is exactly what she was doing. Yep, honesty is always the best. Did I tell you, you looked like a pear in that winter coat?

    Thanks for posting the pinups; will give me hours of imaginative joy.

  15. Rebecca says:

    oh yes, I really enjoyed that compliment! THANK you so much!! you are the sweetest man I know! :)

  16. wrjones says:

    Rebecca – you lovely little Southern Belle, You looked like a GOOD pear!

  17. Bill, Bill, Bill!
    You are missing a good bet with the paint on clothes thing.
    I’ve seen a good example here in a municipal art gallery lately.
    Once you get a paint mark on a good piece of clothing, you continue to paint the clothing. Forget the canvas. Be bold. Dip the whole article of clothing in gesso and let it dry on a hanger so that you don’t get any wrinkles. Don’t bother to put anything under it so that drips get into the carpet. You are starting two new works of art on quality grounds, n’est pas.
    Once the gesso has dried, continue to paint on the shirt. Let it dribble. Let it run down the sleeves. Glory in the freedom of it.
    When you are finished with it, hang it on the wall. It’s Art! And don’t forget the rug underneath it.
    Cut it out in a three foot by three foot square and frame it up. If you have run out of palette space, you might try mixing paints on it. It will add to the flavour and composition.
    (OH no! Bill. I didn’t mean for you to lick the carpet!)
    And on another subject, how did you get away with taking your shirt off at your lady artist’s house? If wifey scolded you for a paint stain, what would she do if she found out you were disrobing at another woman’s house?

  18. Jala Pfaff says:

    Love this spontaneous drawing with its energetic lines.

    How did that person manage to get oil paint out of your shirt?!

  19. gypsy-heart says:

    I love the spontaneity and energy of this sketch!

    I feel for you about the paint on your shirts.

    I finally learned this painting tip:
    *Do NOT set your palette in your chair.*
    Of course, it was after sitting on it (more like sitting IN IT) that I discovered this little tip! I’ll not say how many “sitting” times it took for me to remember it. :O

  20. wrjones says:

    Gypsy – thanks for that most valuable tip. I will tie a string around the brush I’m using as a reminder that I’m not supposed to do something.

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