By WR Jones
My company has a “Reading Buddy” program with a local grade school. I think they are first graders. We read to them for 30-45 minutes once a week. Each adult has a group of 5. I don’t know what to expect of them at that age but they don’t listen worth a hoot. They appear to be dumber than 40 water buffalo. You can read a SHORT paragraph and ask a question. Not a single right answer time after time after time. The little buggers comprehend zilch.
I on the other hand read 20,000 words a minute. The product of an Evelyn Woods speed reading class years ago. I read War and Peace in an hour and a half….. it’s about Russia.
I have some vague recollections of being a model student at this age. I think I got all A’s and kudos for model behavior. Or at least that was my recollection until my mother pulled out a box of old report cards and gave them to my daughter. Why would you save your child’s report cards that long? And then why subject your only begotten son to public humiliation? There were notes from 60 years ago stating I was not paying attention and I was bothering the girls.
I guess somewhere after this first grade business we learn to pay a little more attention and can even stay awake while reading. That period of personality development lasts a number of years before the big down hill slide begins.
Now I can’t listen, comprehend, or stay awake. I think they have reading buddy programs for old geezers. If I get one of my former students reading to me as I nod off, I wonder if he will steal my candy like I did his.
This DEA lady standing behind the tree was listening to me tell my 5 little charges I thought they were wasting their time in school and could make a lot more money working the street corners selling paper flowers for me. If they hustled they could have a Lexus for themselves by the time the 6th grade dance rolled around.
I should have been a teacher. I would enjoy having all summer off.