By WR Jones


    For you H2O lovers, this is a watercolor of one of my daughter’s high school friends, Jessica.

    She looks so lithe, so supple in this pose.

    The young woman who set her bike up next to mine in yesterday’s spin class at the gym was lithe as well.   She was stretching by lifting her leg up to shoulder height.

    What on earth, what sort of desolate, rocky shore caused such a large breaker in my brain wave that made me think I could do that?   Was it that little voice in my head, “Hey Bill, she is a girl, if she can do that so can I”?  

    I felt the pull/tear in my left buttocks before my leg reached waist height.  Did I have the brains to stop at that point.  Well, no, that would mean I couldn’t do that particular move.  I did modify; in order to give the illusion of my leg reaching shoulder height, I sort of crabbed over bringing my shoulder down to meet the leg in the middle somewhere.

    At this point  there raged a verbal battle in my head between the Sense brothers; Common, and Non.  Common, “Oh oh, now you’ve done it.  Better scoot on home and get ice on that.”  Non, “I can’t leave now, they will think I’m an idiot.”  “You don’t know that is common knowledge?”  “Not EVERYBODY knows it, some of these people are new.”  Common, “Suit yourself, good luck with getting out of bed in the morning.”

    So I stayed through the class and rode.  This pumped blood and fine tuned the injury which allowed it to stiffen nicely overnight.  I find it odd how my skin is old and wrinkly, my muscles old and stringy, but those neurons that FIRE pain signals to the brain all seem brand new.

    Luckily I got to work before anyone could see me walking.  I look like I’ve been hobbled and put out in the downhill pasture.   I’ve just taken my last 7 Advil.  If my luck holds, this hot water bottle I have taped to my leg will be enough to drain the catheter so I don’t have to make any trips to the bathroom.  

    NO!  NO!  No! no no no … maybe – Non Sense is talking to me.  He is suggesting I ask the secretary to massage my butt.

This entry was posted in Humor, On Suffering, Painting, Portrait, Watercolor. Bookmark the permalink.

24 Responses to Supple

  1. You might see this around on others blogs but I had to share it with you because it might mean something to you,

    Rainer Maria Rilke in Letters To A Young Poet,

    ”Go within and scale the depths of your being from which your very life springs forth. At its source you will find the answer to the question, whether you must write. Accept it, however it sounds to you, without analyzing. Perhaps it will become apparent to you that you are indeed called to be a writer. Then, accept that fate; bear its burden, and its grandeur, without asking for the reward that might possibly come from without. For the creative artist must be a world of his own and must find everything within himself and in nature, to which he has betrothed himself.”

  2. Bill, Bill, Bill! We never want to think our bodies cannot do what they did 10…or was it 20 years ago! Why do our minds remain so young and foolish when our bodies tell us, “Don’t do that!!” Having injured my back after exercising two days in a row (what was I thinking?), I can “feel your pain.” Perhaps a nice cane like House has on the show will give you that look of devil may care instead of old fogey – oh, and grow out your beard for just 2 days and leave the stubble. That will help, too.

  3. kevmoore says:

    I have, as age has begun to have its wicked way with me, begun a wondrous journey of learning. It has chiefly consisted of discovering tendons and muscles which were previously unknown to me simply by the pain they begin to inflict. I have tendons in the backs of my ankles that have only a nodding acquaintance with the word “elasticity” and muscles that, if they went out on the pull,would only manage to pull themselves. When I attempt to run anywhere, a phenomenon I like to call “Lactic man moves in” occurs and I come to a dead stop. Imagine my surprise then, when after leaping about on stage for an hour like drug-crazed teen, I often spend the next 8 hours immobile with a raging headache. Life sucks.

  4. wrjones says:

    Thanks Mike, I think. Or is this a writer’s kind way to say I shouldn’t be painting?

    Rhonda – I like the cane idea. I want a really cool one.

    Kev – You’ve pretty much summed it all up.

  5. Those Sense brothers sure are at odds, aren’t they?

    Or maybe you meant to say the King brother, Joe?

    Or was that Cho?

  6. Rebecca says:

    lqtm…laughing quietly to myself. See comedian Demetri Martin..freakin’ hilarious!

  7. Celeste Bergin says:

    what a great blog this is! I enjoyed reading this entry…….!

  8. Nava says:

    Oh yeah, beware of Bro Non. I sense he dominates a lot of your actions, especially in spin class.

    Good thing it did not advise you to ask Jessica for such a massage – she may be supple, but she is very Charlie’s Angel here. That’s one very cool painting, by the way – not your typical lithe young woman painting. (oh, and – is that a leaf I see in the background?)

    Have you ever considered hanging out with Brother Common a bit more. like, once a week or so?

  9. Lori says:

    I love the painting Bill, I am so jealous of her litheness.

    I like a good walking stick myself, something with nice carvings on it. Then it looks like you are a hiker.

  10. gypsy-heart says:

    Wonderful painting, wr..but you need to keep a safe distance from all females! You get into trouble every time. All one has to do is read your previous posts!

    Try a yoga classes first. :)

  11. 100swallows says:

    You get funnier and funnier, Bill. That line about the old muscles but the young pain neurons is wonderful.

  12. How DO you come up with these stories??? I know they make me laugh every time…
    Soooooo does your wife read your blog??? Do wives still laugh after years of marriage to a story teller? or do they groan…?
    You do make life lighter for the rest of us though, so keep it up!

  13. wrjones says:

    Diana – yes the brothers are at odds. Guess which one dominates.

    Thanks, Rebecca. Where do I see him? Can you get us tickets? Will you pay for dinner as well? Ok, Ok, I’ll get the tip.

    Thank you, Celeste. Where did you come from? We are stalkers here, but lazy. We need a link to follow you home. Do you keep any left over Halloween candy there?

    Thanks, Nava – Common and I seem to be on different wavelengths.

    Me too Lori; I hope she gets arthritis. I like a walking stick that hides a half pint of Gentleman Jack.

    Gypsy-heart, the world would suck without females. Who would do the housework? And in my case, yardwork, handman stuff, car maintenance, etc.

    Thanks, 100swallows. That like about brand new neurons seems to be a fundamental truth.

    Marian, these are simply recounts of my daily life.
    My wife does not read the blog (thank the Lord) but my daughter does (thank the Devil).

  14. Lori says:

    “I like a walking stick that hides a half pint of Gentleman Jack.” Oooo yes!! I think I will start making them out of bamboo, I can have a section for G.Jack, a section for tootsie rolls, m&ms, and jelly beans! Nobody will know!

  15. Bill – Too funny – just yesterday I had to get something out of the bed of a truck and you should have seen me trying to get up on the tailgate and to the back of the bed. I was so thankful there was no one around. I looked like a slug. I couldn’t help but rememebr a time when I would have hopped right up there and then jumped from the tailgate back down again – I don’t like this aging thing –

  16. wrjones says:

    Lori – now you are taking it to a new level, nice work.

    Cara – how can you not like getting wrinkled, stiff, sore, forgetful, and cranky?

  17. Your stories are always so hilarious… hehe.. The pride of a man!

  18. wrjones says:

    Carmen – I’m not prideful, just stupid.

  19. Rebecca says:

    I wish Demetri Martin was coming here. I’ve seen him on Comedy Central. He is ridiculously funny. Some good people come to Atlanta, so we’re hoping.

  20. wrjones says:

    Ok, Rebecca, I see not mention of you springing for the tickets or dinner. Let me offer an alternative for you NOW type women. You get the tickets and cover my airfare (I will be tough and take coach); I will pay for dinner and tips. I do think we should share one dish as I’m sort of dieting.

  21. bonnieluria says:

    Whatever else you may have damaged it’s not your painting fingers that’s for sure. Or your ability to split the sides of your readers.

    Is your blog’s sponsor AARP?

    I recall being told that if sense was common we’d ALL have it. Maybe we’re lapsed.

    I’ve given up the dangerous sport of going to the gymnauseum, and got a Rebounder- a mini trampoline.
    I bounce myself into senselessness and break nothing except maybe the ceiling fan if I jump too high.

    Miss Supple looks dangerous just standing still.

  22. wrjones says:

    Bonnie – You have been partying with Carol’s friends while that poor woman faced the odious task of going on a cruise. You ladies should be ashamed of yourselves.

  23. carolking says:

    I agree with Bonnie, Ms. Supple and Lithe looks like she’s in a Charlie’s Angels pose.

    Maybe she’ll shoot some sense into you. Common, not non.

  24. wrjones says:

    Carol – she is going to need a cannon.

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