It’s a Series!

By W.R. Jones

    No, not the World Series.  Two, count ’em, two paintings of the same a similar object.  I’m really feeling a kinship with Monet and his haystacks.  I probably shouldn’t be here screwing around on the computer with you all.  I should be at home manning the phones for the plethora of calls bound to come in from collectors throughout the known world.

    Speaking of the World Series, I watched a few minutes of a baseball game the other day.  Goodness, that is a tedious pastime.  I just don’t get it, that game is so boring you really need a logarithmic scale to keep it on the page.   All the players and coaches and managers are so stuptified they have to chew something and spit to keep from falling into a coma.

    In all the years this game has been played has there ever been an adult associated with this pastime?   Did ANYONE ever think, “I’ve noticed we are setting a bad example for the children with this chewing and spitting.  Perhaps we should save it for when we are not on national TV.”  Nope, generation after generation after generation of thoughtless assholes continue the practice.  Is there any other occupation where everybody stands around chewing their cud?

   NOTE BENE:   If you are one of those angry people like Lisa, do not read the following paragraph until you have placed your (cash or gold bullion) bid for this wonderful little watercolor. 

   I’m making myself angry.  Oh, oh – I heard on the radio that studies show upbeat happy people who are active live longer.   I could visualize one of you angry types hearing this news then screaming “MOTHERF..ER!” and dying on the spot.

This entry was posted in Humor, Landscape, Painting and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

31 Responses to It’s a Series!

  1. Thank you Onpainting for the great comment on my piece I posted with the animals in bed….I guess I am just lucky but also know how to put the covers in the appropriate places! If you would like to see the original photo (at age sixty) I painted from follow the link over to Redbubble….

    As always I really enjoy reading your blog while laying around!

  2. Wow great! ….a series!! I can’t seem to do one unless I chew and spit….

  3. Dawn says:

    Thanks for your positive comment..however if there was anything constructive I really do want to hear it! Can’t get better without it.
    I really do like your leaves. It comes to me as simple elegance. Reminds me of a Japanese paining. It would also be nice reproduced for cards…maybe you could sell or give as gifts! I think it’s beautiful.

  4. Dawn says:

    sorry for mis-spelling “painting”! Guess I should re-read what I type a little better!!!

  5. wrjones says:

    Theresa – beautiful photo. I think you should read our blog out loud to the dogs – give them a bit of culture.

    Dawn – OK, I’ll come back to see if I spot any room for improvement. Don’t worry about spelling here. We all hack the words. I left a comment that had so many words spelled wrong I wanted to change my name to Lisa.

  6. Dar says:

    It’s so lovely. I thought of cards, too. I can picture a series of cards representing the places Mango takes you walking.

  7. kevmoore says:

    Does this mean that if you paint an entire tree it can be called a collection?

  8. kevmoore says:

    p.s. when you started talking about a ballgame using the words “coma” “stupefied” and “boring” I could’ve sworn you were referring to cricket.

  9. wrjones says:

    Dar – the cards would show a track from under the bed to the refrigerator. He likes cheese.

    Kev – ya, I think a tree ought to do it. Cricket, I think, is for boring “gentlemen”. Baseball is for boring trailer trash. Painting is for ….? I don’t know what painting is for – I can’t find any ladies to be cheerleaders even when I offer to provide the uniforms.

  10. Bill, what a beautiful start to your new series. the leaves are so freshly painted. wow! Holly

  11. Rebecca says:

    I’ve heard that many substitute chewing gum for chew! I actually saw a guy who was post mouth cancer…a huge hole in his lower lip region…you could see his teeth with his mouth closed! yuck!

    By the way…not a pizza and 2 doughnuts…an omelette and 2 bagels..close, though!

  12. Rebecca says:

    oh and keep going with the series. good jarb!

  13. Nava says:

    I find it hard to leave a comment on this one. All those tears of joy are blurrying the screen and make the keyboard so vague I cannot type without mestiakeses! I am just so proud of you – a series! Now you only have 18 more to go to get to the magic number of 20.

    Choked with emotions,


    Oh, and thank you for introducing me to the word ‘cud’. You are very good for my English vocabulary of, um, highly useful words.

  14. carolking says:

    WOW! A Series! Do you only paint leaves that Mango pees on?

    Can’t wait to see the THIRD of a series. Keep ’em coming!

  15. Lori says:

    Lovely! I wish more leaves turned color around here. Keep it up and pretty soon you will surpass my series of three and a half.

    Ahh baseball. My major memories of that were in PE where some amazon hit the ball and it hit me so hard in the tummy I fell down on my sitter. The teacher, a mannish old woman (she was sort of stork-like too) asked me if I was all right, I couldn’t breathe so couldn’t answer so she didn’t worry about me. I died of course. The nasty old bag. I don’t like baseball at all.

  16. kevmoore says:

    note to Lori – If you introduce some kinds of insect pests to your foliage, you will find your leaves turn colour quite rapidly, from green to brown to black dead. It happened to my hedge. I never really thought of it as a painting opportunity – perhaps I should be more of a “glass is half-full” kind of guy. I’ve obviously been corresponding with Bill too long.
    It’s a shame about not finding anyone to wear the cheerleader uniforms Bill, but if you find a qualified seamstress to let them out, you’ll still be able to wear them.

  17. wrjones says:

    Holly – what do you mean start? This series is complete. What do people do with leaves – they burn them or bury them. No sense in watching all my efforts go up in smoke. I’m going to paint old tires; we keep those in the front yard forever.

    Doggone it, Nava, listening to you cry has me all teared up as well. It is making my nose run and I can’t find a tissue. Luckily I’m wearing a long sleeve shirt today. This is probably not a good place to pick up English as a second language skills. You’ll end up sounding like an illiterate sailor.

    Carol – 3? Ok, I may have been a little hasty in pushing you to produce more. There is no need to be vindictive. I don’t think I have another leaf in me. If I did a series of what Mango pees on I would have a large collection of carpet paintings.

    Here is my business model for this series concept: only paint 2; then my collectors will be drooling at the idea they can afford to own the entire series. There are a lot of people into the “completeness” thing.

    Well, Lori, maybe if you moved out of that swampland of old geezers where EVERY store sells hearing aid batteries you could find some colored leaves. Pick yourself up and get back out on that field – show that old biddy what you are made of.

    Kev – “hedge” is such an English word. I can just see you triming your hedge in high rubber boots and a tweed jacket. You are so right about “waste not, want not” – what with losing half of my lifetime savings in the last week – I will be wearing those uniforms.

  18. 100swallows says:

    I like that new header, Bill, but I can’t figure out what those golden vapors rising are.

  19. kevmoore says:

    Bill, the financial world is indeed going to hell in a hand-cart. perhaps we should all learn to paint a reasonable facsimile of a dollar bill, just in case…

  20. Lori says:

    Kev, I need some bugs that turn the leaves to red or orange or yellow. Not brown-black-dead.

    Bill I bet the old biddy is long gone, I’ll bet I out-lived her. She looked about a hundred way back then.

    I think I’ll stay put in the swamp, I’ll just put some more orange in the palm trees.

  21. Beverly says:

    I appreciate you taking the time to take a gander at my blog! I could spend days on those hands and still want to cut them off (figuratively speaking) and my own for not accomplishing what I see in paint (literally speaking) I love your commentary on your blog! So enjoyable to read and I’m working on that aspect of mine…Thanks again for the kind words…

  22. I hope you’ll do more of these and keep painting (or is that paining?).

  23. kevmoore says:

    lori – ah…what you’re looking for is autumn…I always was a little slow on the uptake…

  24. Lori says:

    Kev, Yes! Autumn…Thats it! Do you have any where you are?

  25. bonnieluria says:

    Lovely leaves and every series begins with 1.
    I miss the turning of the colors. Here, they go from green to green to green to finally brown when it doesn’t rain, and then they drop. Usually all over the windshield of the car.

    Why, in baseball, is the act of adjusting male genitalia ok, yet the same activity in the parking lot of K-Mart, would result in being arrested and having landing a spot on every evening news channel?
    Just wondering…..

  26. wrjones says:

    Swallows – that vapor is supposed to be a dead weed. Ok, I will look for a workshop on how to paint dead weeds.

    Kev – I think my paintings should start to move. They have to be worth more than stock certificates.

    Lori lives in Florida. The leaves there must hang on to a tree for dear life. If they turn color and fall they are taken by a hurricane to the state of Georgia where they become compost for peach orchards.

    Beverly – I know well how hard it is to paint hands. I spent days on one hand 2 inches across. I asked for help from everyone. It never did satisfy me so I took up drinking and turning down the lights. Looks much better now.

    Diana – I will keep painting but 100swallows tells me I need to paint better weeds, so I don’t know if I will have time for leaves, although some of my leaves look like weeds; maybe I can do 2 bad paintings in one.

    Rip van Bonnie – you woke from your long slumber under the mast. The baseball boys are hanging on to their nuts worried they can’t live up to that huge phallic symbol they see on your blog.

  27. At least you know you’re doing your bit for the longevity of humanity… At least that group that follows your blog. You make me smile and laugh each time I see your post….. the words… I didn’t mean the art!!! I know… leaf it alone.

    By the way… I see that you and Lisa have gotten into the fall spirit with your color schemes, leaf series and the new banner!! VERY NICE!

  28. wrjones says:

    Thanks Marian.

    Lisa worked hard on that banner – now if she would just post SOMETHING.

  29. Way to go Bill! Leaves #2. Is that one a week so far?

  30. wrjones says:

    Susan – with encouraging words like that, I’m going to do another leaf … next week.

    Hope you had a great artrails weekend and next week is even better.

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