By WR Jones
While the elephant painting hoax was cleverly done, I think those people should be ashamed of themselves for causing Lisa so much stress. Rest assured, Lisa, you paint every bit as good as the simple majority of elephants.
For the longest time I was returning home after work and finding rough sketches of trees throughout the house. I would find them in the oddest places; under the bed, behind the sofa, by the dog bowls, etc. I thought the housekeeper was influenced by my work and was learning to draw instead of clean. I would also notice my paint supplies had been tampered with from time to time, and even more disturbing was that my favorite brush had the tip of the handle chewed off.
It had to be the housekeeper, but what an odd habit. I tried to make her smile so I could look for bits of paint brush wood between her teeth. I couldn’t get a laugh out of her. The only Spanish I know is “where is the bath room?” (I’m writing it here in English for you big dummies). She did not laugh at that but just kept repeating “Que?” Of course, she used those upside down Mexican question marks but I can’t find them on my keyboard.
Finally, in frustration, I spent the money for a cheap small hidden still camera. Let’s just say I was totally unprepared for what I captured.
Mango was painting. He was painting trees. I couldn’t afford the more expensive full video cameras so I will have to tell you what I witnessed. I know many of you will be skeptical as I have been known to embellish, however slightly, a story in the past. But this time the man who lied wolf is telling the honest to god nearly truth.
He would paint a tree trunk, sniff it, then raise his leg and squirt a tiny amount of pee on each tree. His little leg just quivvered; he was really into this painting. It seems as though he has been academically trained somewhere as I noticed he would squint down to look at the outside reference trees. But then he would doze off, so maybe he was simply copying my painting technique.
So, altough he has the intelligence to paint, he can’t tell the difference between a painted image and the real thing. I tried to explain to him he doesn’t need to mark every damn tree in the painting like he does on our walks. That right there perfectly illustrates the difference between man and animal. I don’t pee on my painted trees. I save my water for those nights Mango and I go for our walk.