Archive for the ‘Figure’ Category

h1

Water and Oil

November 21, 2011

By wr jones

We are in limbo in a move to AZ.  Most of belongings and all furniture are gone.  Only us left, sleeping on floor feeling age every time we creak up.   I decided to do some small studies for future larger pieces.   Most of my oil paints were packed and shipped so I would do watercolors.   Christ!! I forgot how unforgiving watercolor is.  You must think and plan for a successful watercolor; neither of which I do well.  I don’t know where I’m going during a painting much less beforehand.  And when I’m done I  don’t know where I’ve been thus preventing me from learning for future work.

I had a new plastic palette which I didn’t prepare.  The water would bead up so tightly I couldn’t get it to mix.  The brush would soak up all the color at once and palette would be stark white.  I remembered having this problem years ago but could not remember why.  Screw it, I went back to oil.   Painted directly over the watercolor.  Paper is not my favorite painting surface but it was all I had not counting the walls of the sold house.

Ok, enough about painting let’s get to my real rant:

I called Shell to give them a change of address.  Then I thought why not do paperless via email,  where a change of address would not matter.   A male service rep told me they did not have my full social security or my birth date.  Note that I did give him the last 4 of social, address, and card number to verify identity at start of call.  He took my new info and said he had to verify it.  15 minutes go by on hold, then phone call drops.   I call back and get a female rep.  Repeat the info and she say she has to verify and leaves me hanging for 10 minutes.  When she came back I ask what the devil took so long.  She said she was talking to her supervisor and they need for me to send a photocopy of my social security card and my driver’s license via land mail.   I responded – Fuck you close the account!  (on the inside) What came out was, “please close the account now, and do you realize I have had that card and used and paid it every month for 40 YEARS.”    I’m astounded at the greed for information that is not relevant for a business agreement.   I’ve never had any company ask for photocopy of social and driver’s license. What the hell is wrong with these people?  I felt like I was on a phishing call.

h1

Waiting For Rain

October 4, 2011

By W.R. Jones

Waiting For Rain

Whoa, I have not posted in a long time!  I must paint faster in the future.

Thank you all for your supportive words.  They are appreciated.

This country woman looks sort of lonely to me.  She is waiting for rain, her lawn is a little scruffy and she has a radish patch out back that is dry.  I probably would be lonely too. painting all by myself, but I have my companion, Mango.

Mango Surfing The Net

While I paint Mango surfs the net – “Looking for fine bitches”, he tells me.  When I told him to watch his language, he replied, “Get a dictionary grandpa.  Oh, never mind, you are too old and I’m busy skyping this little beauty.”

I’ve got to get back to painting now.  If I can finish another one this year that will be two, and in a row mind you.

h1

Chicken Drover

March 6, 2011

By W.R. Jones

Given the infantile musings of my mind, I know exactly the thoughts racing through this toddler’s head.  He is calculating the odds that he will have to let go his beloved doll to throttle that chicken.

On another note, did you ever try to back out of the garage without first opening the door?  Doesn’t work well.  Outside of perusing the Merck Manual to stoke my raging hypochondria, I don’t have any formal medical training, but my “man on the street” gut feel is this lapse does not speak well for my mental health.

The good news is the remaining brain cells are still capable of working as a team to scheme our way out of the expected coming spousal brow beating in the offering.

Possibilities:

1.  Vandals – most likely those kids I strong armed to get their Halloween candy bags last year.

2.  A self healing gas line explosion from inside the garage that blew the door out.

3.  An international ring of car thieves wanting my van with 260,000 miles to sell in Mexico.  They forgot to open door first, panicked, and ran.

If you have any more plausible explanations stories lies, we could perhaps discuss a fee structure agreeable to us both.

 

 

 

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 40 other followers